Pride's Bad Morning
by Latios381
Summary: A morning in Pride's shoes! Little one-shot that shows that Pride's life is not as easy as many may think... Evil doesn't mean luck, after all.


**A/N: This is based on the manga and FMA Brotherhood, not 2003 anime. Huh… it's a bit OOC… I don't think this contains spoilers, only for Pride's age (according to what I read on .com) and that doesn't affect much.**

**Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist belongs to Hiromu Arakawa.**

**Note: In Italics are his thoughts and his Homunculus voice is in bolds.**

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Pride. The origin of all sins. The worst and most unforgiveable of all. The only sin that cannot die, for a man's pride is something that can't be taken.

Well, that's what it was supposed to be, at least for _The_ Sin.

But, how can a man be prideful when his body is that of a 10-year-old or so kid? Come on, imagine going to someone and say, 'Hi, I'm Pride, I'm over 300 years old and I'm definitely not a kid. I'm near immortal and I have super powers!', then get the answer, 'Bwahaha! You're so funny, little boy! Where are your parents? You shouldn't be alone out here, the world is dangerous, you know?'

Yes, this is Pride, a 300-year-old LITTLE KID. The most prideful man in History!

Pride, or rather, Selim Bradley, woke up on his huge bed (which is unnecessary, because he is SMALL), his first morning thought being _'__I wonder what the cooker__ did for breakfast? Hope it__has __some __blood at least…'_

But no, his hopes were soon crushed by… a cheesecake. A big one (which seemed to crush his hopes even more).

"Cheesecake! I love it! Thank you very much for your cooking, miss," he thanked the cooker. _'Dammit…__ Cheesecake again__, why do I have to eat it? I'm going to have a talk with Wrath soon…'_

The cooker bowed and left Pride alone with his 'beloved' cheesecake. He used a spoon and ate one little piece of it. Then left the kitchen to get his bag and go to the rich school where he had to go and learn how to write small basic essays and pretend to be a prodigy kid and the best student of the whole school (not that he would be surpassed by 10-year-olds anyway). And of course he had a driver.

"What's up, Pride? Going to school?," said the annoying voice of Envy, his younger brother, who had the awesomely great idea of killing Pride's driver because of a bet he made with Gluttony, about whether the driver would taste any good or not. Now he had to replace him before Pride would get a new one. Not that he cared, but Envy sometimes could be annoying.

"**You should already know that**," coldly replied Pride, with is darker voice.

Envy seemed to ignore him.

"That's so horrible, I can't even imagine standing little kids running and jumping around, you must have great self control," it was lucky Envy was too distracted with the cars in front of him to notice Pride's glare. It was better for Envy that way.

"**Unlike you, I'm mature enough to contain my emotions.**** Our plans are more important. I cannot kill them without causing a ruckus**."

"Yeah, what a shame. Where's the school again?"

Pride would have facepalmed if that wasn't too immature for him. Instead he grabbed his bag with the strength of a kid.

As he came out of the car, he heard a "I'll pick you up at noon, don't get late," from Envy, and seriously pondered to run away. Unfortunately, he couldn't.

He stepped forward and heard a 'spoosh' noise coming from under him. He looked at his feet, a terrified look on his face.

Dog.

Poop.

Freshly made.

The entire school heard a screamed "**Dammiiiiiiiiit**!" in a demonical voice that sent chills to all teachers and kids. No one ever found out where it had come from. Some say it was Devil himself, but you already know how rumors are.

*******Noon*******

"Hi!" this was Envy's reply to an annoyed Pride, who stepped inside the black armored car. Why was it that Envy seemed awfully happy and cheerful today? "How was your day?" he asked while they were driving off to the big house where Pride lived.

"**It was like any other day**," replied Pride, deciding to leave his little incident to himself.

"What did you do in your class?"

" **We wrote an essay**."

"Again? Dammit, you never get tired of it? And what was that essay about?"

"**About what we wanted to be when we grew up**." Pride wasn't liking where the talk was getting to.

"Ironic. What did you write?"

"**That I wanted to be a State Alchemist to help my 'father'**."

"Whaat? How boring…"

"**Hmph."**

"No wonder you never grow up, always doing the same thing over and over…"

Next thing we see is Envy running away in the middle of the street and the black car stopped next to the parking lot (or whatever there is one) in front of the Central Headquarters. Pride decided to put the car where it belonged, but unfortunately his feet couldn't get to the pedals.

The End.

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**A/N: That was OOC, but whatever… Just a little one-shot about Pride's morning, first fic I post here, so go easy on me…**

**By the way, I love cheesecake.**

**Please review! :3**


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